If you know anything about me, it’s that in 2020 I started reading “Live Fearless” by Sadie Robertson. I took months to read, highlight and underline every single thing that I felt like God was using to speak to me. It is honestly what really pushed me to grow in my personal relationship with the Lord.
Ever since that experience, I became so intrigued by Sadie’s books and podcasts. I frequently listened to them and wrote notes in my journal of what I learned from each guest speaker. It was such a pivotal part of my growth as person and as a Christ Follower. It specifically helped shift my mindset when it concerns selfishness. Even subconscious selfishness…. which might actually be worse, because it means you are selfish and don’t even second guess it. I’m sure it would be pretty easy to come up with an example of someone in your life that displays what I like to call the “Here I am” attitude. It would probably be harder to admit that at some point YOU have been that person to someone else. I know I have.
In my early to mid teens I was not well sought after by anyone, friends or boys. But in my early 20s I got a lot more attention, and embarrassingly enough, I liked it… a lot. I didn’t post half naked pictures or anything, but I definitely knew how to get a guy’s attention. At the time, I didn’t realize how my loud voice and “don’t give a crap” tough act was a cry for attention. I was always miss independent. I often used it to showcase my desire to be the person that everyone in the room was looking at or talking to. I was honestly mean to a lot of people. All who seemed like they deserved it at the time. And maybe they did. However when someone said something negative about me, I confronted it and made sure they knew who they were messing with. I’m not exactly sure what inspired this behavior, but its extremely embarrassing looking back. I’ve decided the early 20s should not count as adulthood, because there is so much growing up and maturing that has to be done in that time.
Anyway, as I endured hardship and heartbreak, my heart softened. The Lord has humbled me in a lot of ways… and continues to do so. I truly have grown and matured so much its actually a night and day difference. Although traces of that part of me still exist deep down, I try to keep that nasty version locked up tight.
Going back to our original topic of finding an example of a “Here I am” person. I now want you to think of someone who is the opposite. Someone who is likely humble, kind and inviting – a “There you are” type of person. Why is it that we seem to relate so much more to the “Here I am” person than the “There you are” person? Probably because our nature is not to be humble, kind or servant-hearted. Our nature is to be selfish.
Now stay with me here. I’m going to switch gears for just a second but I promise it will all come back together.
A quick little story time: Recently, my husband and I discovered a new little coffee shop about 7 minutes from our house. It’s nestled in village marketplace with pilates clubs and bike shops. Very cutesy. We have been back not once but twice since we first visited. The first time we came, we had no idea what to expect outside of your typical coffee shop. We were welcomed with a warm invite and we asked for some suggestions based on our different palettes. The girl who helped us was so kind and bubbly. She had such a bright personality, and it honestly made me believe that she had a personal relationship with Jesus. Iykyk. The joy of the Lord is so easily identifiable. We got our drinks and I LOVED mine. A week later we came back with my in laws and nephew. The same barista said “Hey! You guys are back. Welcome back!” She served us again and this time I asked for her name because I didn’t get it last time. “Oh my name is Brenna, but you can call be B if you want!” Again she was so smiley and bubbly. This last week I came back again with my daughter for a coffee date with a friend. Brenna wasn’t there when we first arrived, but later she came in and says “Oh my gosh! Its so great to see you again! How are you? Thanks for coming back!”
As someone who has worked in retail my entire working career, I can tell you I have NEVER seen anyone with so much genuine joy and kindness. She is the most bright and sunny person. A living breathing “There you are” person. The type of person to continue to listen when everyone else changes the subject. The type of person to remember your favorite drink or flower. The type of person to ask you about that thing you were struggling with a while back, because you just know they’ve secretly been praying for you. A person who makes you feel seen and valued even as a stranger.
I won’t claim to have had some radical encounter that made me a perfectly skilled “There you are” person overnight. I am perfectly perfect at one thing – being selfish. I am vain. I care what people think. I have too much pride. However, it doesn’t stop my heart from desiring to be the person who makes others feel loved and seen. It doesn’t have to be an all or nothing type of deal. No one became perfect at anything overnight (or at all for that matter). But as I’ve said before, it’s less about perfection and more about progression. I think a great way to start is to ask God to reveal people in your life who maybe need to feel that type of love. The type of people who need that intentionality and need to be shown that they are seen. From there, make genuine connection with them. Listen more than you speak. Ask questions to invite deeper conversation. Make mental notes of the things you talk about and bring it up later to ask them about the progression of said thing. Offer to pray over them. Make a habit of praying over them daily in private. Just be kind.
It really is so easy to make people feel loved. Our heart posture as a “There you are” person should always be “less of me and more of God.” If I try to show off my best, I will do less than if I just live as an open vessel for the Lord and allow His joy to be what fuels my heart for others.
What changes can YOU personally make to become a ”There you are” person opposed to a “Here I am” person? Tell me in the comment section below!
The Grace-filled Home 